The more I go to church...

The more I attend church the less I seem to be willing to accept the idiocy.
Is this what the phrase 'losing religion' means? It's not the inverse of 'gaining' it so far as I can tell. It's a consistent, progressive chafing at the inherent flaws that others ignore. Gaining, if that's what really occurred to me some 5 or 6 years ago, felt different. Not a steady numbness or increasing indifference to flaws. Though to be fair life wasn't exactly nice at the time and perhaps it's more that I was retreating from life in general and thus not paying attention to what I was doing.
Hm.

Anyway. Since I never manage to remember thing like this later...
How is it that God is supposed to be as expressed (unchanging, love, perfect, never mistaken, etc) yet in the famous passages where Moses receives the commandments and Aaron builds a golden cow (EXO 32) God as much as says "Oh forget it. I'm just going to kill all those people and make you, Moses, a 'great nation.'" Wait, this is our benevolent god? Serious echoes of Noah here (which He said He'd never do again... that's a different argument).

Then over a couple of verses later Moses convinces Him to change His mind? Wait, I though God's opinions were immutable? How does He go from destroying these sinful people (oh yes, those that love their children are willing to slay them at the slightest insult?) to, well, we're not told hoe He felt after Moses reminded Him of His oaths... wait. Why did God, of all beings, need to be reminded of His oaths to Abraham? Hm again.